Plush edition · balaclava included

FomoMacro

$FOMOMACRO

Fomo Macro, a round tuxedo kitten in a black knit cat-ear balaclava

Open here

Who's in the box

The cat that feels every candle before you do.

    Every Macro comes with

    Cat-ear balaclavaHand-knit. The ears on top are his real ears, tucked in.

    Two glossy eyesLocked on the macro print before you even open the app.

    TurtleneckPulled up the second a Fed speaker starts talking.

    Soft round bellyDo not boop without asking. He will ask why.

    Diamond pawsSmall, cream, fluffy. They do not let go.

    How to play with Macro

    1. 1
      Take him out of the box. Gently. He was already awake, watching the calendar.
    2. 2
      Find his tag. It's on the bottom flap: the address that says he's the real one.
    3. 3
      Say hi in the den. The Macro den on Telegram is where he reads every message twice.
    4. 4
      Hood up before the headline. He already is.

    Warning

    Contains FOMO. Not suitable for anyone who can sleep through a notification. Keep away from closed laptops. Macro is a meme and a mascot, not a promise: nothing on this box is financial advice.